FUCK. I FINALLY FOUND IT AGAIN
I’VE BEEN SEARCHING FOR THIS GEM FOR AGES
IT’S SO FUCKING FUNNY
Howdy tumblr, my name is Rawhide Kobayashi.
I’m a 27 year old Japanese Japamerican (western culture fan for you foreigners). I brand and wrangle cattle on my ranch, and spend my days perfecting my craft and enjoying superior American passtimes. (Barbeque, Rodeo, Fireworks)
I train with my branding iron every day, this superior weapon can permanently leave my ranch emblem on a cattle’s hide because it is white-hot, and is vastly superior to any other method of livestock marking. I earned my branding license two years ago, and I have been getting better every day.
I speak English fluently, both Texas and the Oklahoma dialect, and I write fluently as well. I know everything about American history and their cowboy code, which I follow 100%
When I get my American visa, I am moving to Dallas to work in an oil field to learn more about their magnificent culture. I hope I can become a cattle wrangler for the Double Cross Ranch or an oil rig operator for Exxon-Mobil!
I own several cowboy hats, which I wear around town. I want to get used to wearing them before I move to America, so I can fit in easier. I rebel against my elders and seniors and speak English as often as I can, but rarely does anyone manage to respond.
Wish me luck in America!